I hung our new 2016 calendar with mixed emotions. The last 12 months vanished in the blink of an eye. There were so many things I wish I’d done in those months, but days turned into weeks, and before I knew it, the year was over.
As a mommy, I am having a very difficult time facing this year. This new year is a year of SO many changes for our family. My oldest baby starts school this fall! I find myself thinking, “this is the last winter I’ll have without a baby in school”…”this is the last Christmas we’ll have without having a school break”…. this is huge!
On top of that, while we are packing away Christmas decorations, we are also packing away the baby swing, the rock-and-play sleeper, 3 month AND 6 month baby clothing. (Will you understand if I sit on the floor and sob?!)
I’m okay with change. But change is hard when it means that my babies aren’t such babies anymore. I love watching them grow, though. But change is hard. I’m okay with it, but it can be hard.
The next 12 months can change our lives in ways that we can never imagine. We never know who will come into our lives, who will leave our lives, who will move, who will lose a job, who will get sick, etc. We never know. Not knowing can be scary or it can be exciting.
I have hopes and dreams for myself, my marriage, and my family for the next 12 months. I intend to seize opportunities that move in those directions as soon as I see them rather than waiting for a week to turn into 2 weeks and then into the next season before I’ve done what I intend to do.
We never know what tomorrow will bring. I just want to be present. I want to BE with my guys and not regret letting time slip through my fingers.
The verse that has been on my mind since New Years has been Hebrews 5:15-16: “Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil.”
I want to learn to count my days and not let them slip by. I want to use them wisely because my family is only in this stage ONCE. As exhausting as some days can be, all of my guys will eventually grow up and go to school. I want to embrace these days (not SAVOR every single moment, because that’s not realistic)…I want to remember that I was PRESENT and active with my guys, not wasting my time on things that can wait until naptime.
Because “the greatest contribution [I] may make to the kingdom of God may be who [I] raise” (Andy Stanley), you just never know. 🙂